Saturday, February 19, 2011

Wasn't it a dream???

Life is something that cannot be defined. It keeps on swinging from one moment to the next. The world has given no birth to a man who can foretell whats in front of his life. In vague sense it can take us from the depth of deepest sorrow to height of blissful state.
Born in the country side, I have a long tale to narrate about the gift I got from the creator.In the forgone years, during my childhood period, I was asked to go for school. No sooner did I hear about the school, my heart pounded vigorously to generate tears in the eyes. Its not simple for me to describe why my heart was so reluctant to go for schooling.Elder brothers and sisters of mine were the pieces of happiness for they were beaten by the age not to go for a place abound with flow of wisdoms,the school.I then knew that my siblings too were suffering from a fear of School, so called scolionophobia.
To fight against the fear that was placing my life on the horn of constant dilemma, I literally prayed my beloved sisters why they were unwilling to go for school.Under scorching rays of compulsion, one of my elder sisters told me that having education was like undergoing corporal punishment in the prison. The word punishment paralyzed my whole mind and soul,with the agonizing pain in my heart. The reason got intensified when one of my friends who went for School complained the parent about the same. He firmly refused to go as he was inflicted with unbearable pain by enforcing him to sit in the basket(basket made from bamboo) fraught with nettle plants.Every student had different story to tell, regarding the mode of punishment in the school.No doubt, punishment was definitely prevalent in the school.
It so happened that the mayor paid a visit to the village only to enforced the parent to send their children for schooling. So immeasurable was the height of the fear I underwent to know that I would be sent for school. When a day was left for me to bid farewell to my parents, sudden rush of emotion signaled me to leave the world permanently. To my astonishment, I could see my father struggling to free my neck from the loop of diabolic rope. In the house, everything was empty for me except the fact that there was a huge cry in the house to know the extreme step I had taken only to escape from the punishment. They assured me that I will be kept with them forever.
Months flew by, to give way to year, and many years ran away disregarding my life. A day came, it was really the day destined to change the course of my life. I didn't know how and who took me to the place which was unfamiliar to my eyes.But I could see myself amidst hundred or so heads. I was fully grown up not to fear anyone. It was so thrilling for me to see that my dad and mom were standing by the white long building with the marked of joy in their faces. And suddenly I realized it was the school, where I was about to begin my formal education.With the closure of the day, my parents assured me that they would pay visit every morning, only to figure out that I was being fooled.
I knew that my parents left me alone in the bevy of unknown faces. I cried for a day until a stranger came to console me. We then became the best friend.No catastrophe ever disrupted my schooling life. All the happenings that happened in the rest of my life in school just appear muffled,yet I am proud to see myself continuing professional education.
When I was overtaken by the fear of school, when the parents were struggling to make me stay in the world, when no willing heart ever grew to study and when ambition to become someone in life had never occured.....I wonder wasn't it a dream to be in nursing profession???

Thursday, February 10, 2011

I miss you Dungtsho...

When everyone in the heart of Thimphu city prepared many things to usher new year,my heart started beating faster than ever before.The very tension hanged my soul too high against the gravity until my eyes were closed with the arrival of night.
I woke up with the start when sweet shrill voice struck my ear,"wake up and have dinner". It was my brother."Well Acho, I will take it later",I replied him as I ran my fingers on the eyes to clarify the vision.I took a plate of rice and slept again.
As the rays of morning sun peeped through the window glass, I went for bathroom to take hot water bath.No sooner had I entered the room, there was a call,it was my friend Lhab Dorji. His voice was shallow and stammering as he said,"Wai Nima, I have very bad news to tell you today".I didn't expect any tidings other than the wishes for new year."Our friend",he continued after a long pause,"jamtsho was expired in the bike accident". "Who...who,,told you?" I shoot back the broken word. "Aue Nado, told me of the incident" came the answer to my question.
I could not believe with my ears because I knew very well that he won't go in bike anywhere as you and I do. By nature he is very simple, kind and friendly. He never tell an iota of word that can hurt the sentiment of mankind. Every hair in the world can talk and sit comfortably with him even at the first encounter, for his physique is embodied with tinge of smile.So who can ever believe that the god has brutally snatch the life out of my beloved friend, Sonam.
His death was confirmed after I had a telephonic conversation with Lopen Nado,who is also doing the same course to that of the deceased.I made many calls to my friends and senior friends to inform them of the sad demise of our beloved friend.Nobody really trusted me until I plea them time and again. We,the members of dsi family gathered to do something for the friend who no more agreed to be our friend after he got entrapped in the trap of death.
After thorough discussion, we made our way for temples to offer prayers and butter lamp.We spent whole day going from one temple to the next. We faced no transportation problems to pay visit to holy icons and places as many of our seniors were having a car each.
Though new year was right in front of us, it only gave us profound sadness.It was the day which took the part of our heart by stealing the life of my friend.
You gave us everything you have:comfort, peace,money and all the worldly things. Although you are gone from the corner of our eyes, you will always remain closed at my heart till I take the last breath. I misss you Dungtsho......

We bid you tearful farewell sir...

He is an excellent academician, a freedom fighter in nursing profession,a man who believes in equality and justice, a man with farsighted vision, a leader who posses student friendly quality,a teacher with magnanimous charisma, a supporter of human right and a man with devotion and dedication. He is no one but my principal S. N Nanjeda Gowda.
Though your reign in the college is very short, dramatic development and changes has taken place at alarming rate. You have concocted many things to furnish colour to our profession. Gross improvement has taken place in various fields: library, academics, labs and sports to name few.Besides this, clinical experiences has transformed from absolute uselessness in the past 3 years to productive one today because of your effort and initiative.We salute you for turning the wheel of revolution and reformation in our college.
Your farsighted vision and dedication has given life for the celebration of infinite health days and workshop, which has broaden our mind beyond what we learn in the four walls of classroom. Will same thing remain green after your departure? Thats the big question.
Flexibility and considering nature is what makes your personality glow in the eyes of every student. You have been always there in every thick and thin to throw light in the horizon of our life to dispel darkness of problematic situations. We remain indebted for your generous guidance, direction and support.
Mournful day is today, eyes in the tears, agonizing pain in the soul, heaviness in breath, and profound sorrow in the broken hearts, to learn that icon of nursing advocate is leaving us all alone like the blind man in the deserted plain. No measure can measure the pangs of pain and blackness of sorrow. But how can we hold you to stay with us when you are leaving for goodness,thats ready to shower upon your life like the dizzling rain
Dear sir, the world is too far, yet too near. The god will bring us together anywhere at any time. We will always be there to pay homage and respect to you.
As you begins to fly for the place of fortune, may your life be filled with peace, prosperity and happiness. Trust me sir, you will always remain missing piece of our heart. May god bless you.

Sunday, September 19, 2010

From nonveg to veg

Like the gigantic men, there stand three magnificient mountains overlooking eachother, segregated by incessantly singing rivers.One of the three elements located to the north bends its neck to shoulder the roomy space for the growth of the settlement. There a boy was born in the backward family background.
The boy, as many people pointed was meek and docile, and never found the time to mingle with the peers. It so happened that his parent decided to send the boy for school and he was given the elaborate information.Socialing was the biggest enemy of his mind.Out of profound sadness and apprehension, he made consolidated decision to end his life by strangulation.His father assured him that he would not let him go for the school. So the boy was given the chance to study philosophy that had been inherited down from the forefather.Many years passed,there was no tinge of improvement in the study and in leu of that the boy had developed the art of slaughtering animals-domestic and wild.The parent's endeavour to concoct religious mind out of the boy got evaporated in the tear of sadness and thus he was left alone to engross himself in the world he wish to be.
The boy showed keen interest in the art of killing. He lit the world of the parent by trapping numerous creatures;deer, boar and lot more from the jungle and selling them to the neighbouring people. With the passage of time, the house became like the butcher shop where throng of the masses made their way to buy the meat. His thirst for killing found no bound and was invited everywhere in the locality to kill.
Two years later, when he was 10, bevy of teachers came to the village to enforce the parents to send their child for study so that the school which was three days walk could sight the countable number of heads to keep it runing under the revolving wheel of Royal Goverment.Nothing could be done but to drag the boy to School.The behavior is learnt and can be shaped;the introvert nature of the boy was transformed to extrovert.When the door of a month of his stay in the school closed to usher the next, he could feel the rhythmic beat of eagerness to intermingle with the people.No doubt, there were no other chidren in the class who could vanquish the boy in the study. He received priceless awards for his ability to bring flying results in the academics.Like the pomposity that was grown in the village, so did his popularity in the School till 9th standard.
Closure of the academic sessions kicked the boy out of the school in 2006 as it used to be in the gone years.When he reached the home for vacation, he was extremely happy to know that construction of new house was in progress.The father ordered the boy to take away the breath of the cow so that it can be used to recruit people for the construction of the house.Given the chance he took the cow to be hanged on the tree which extends its hands towards the south. No sooner had he began to climb the tree with the metallic rope in his hand, a sudden gush of eccentric feeling overpowered his mind. To his astonishment, he eyed the bulbs of tears oozing from the shimmering eyes of the cow. He got down the tree and went back to the house with the eyes fraught with the tears to inform parent regarding the incident. He released the cow against the wishes of the parents. Within few moments he could find the fleecy clouds of sadness, sympathy, generiosity and compassion veiling his head and took dramatic steps not to take away the life of any forms of being at any cost. Incomplete portion of the house was completed by force of money.
Weeks and months walked away to measure the length of the year. During the time of board examination, the health of the boy came under the hand of devilish illness, yet the chain of destinay pulled him to Bangalore, India, to pursue B.Sc.Nursing couse. Till then the aforesaid tragic happening haunt him all the time.This drove his mind to receive blessing from His Holiness Penor Rinpoche when he paid a visit to Mysore. He also took the oath never to cause any forms of harm to sentient being and to convert the eating habit from nonveg to veg.
(He was a veg, he is a veg and he will be veg. And the boy is he, who wrote the article 'from nonveg to veg')

Thursday, September 16, 2010

A beautiful trip.

As the Volvo bus pulled all its contents to the destined destination, my heart experienced a heavy flow of the blood as never before to impart the message on the brain that a body fully embellished with the fragile soul is spearheading its way to the place where one could sight the wonder of the world. A minute of journey made me think that travelling in such luxurious bus is but the heaven created by the man. Unlike the ordinary bus it has everything to offer ranging from fleecy sofa to a machine to cool down the boiling air. So the force of the comfort was vehemently great and provoked the god of sleep to shut my eyes

So wonderful was the dream I dreamt in the bus. There were thousands of angels to welcome me to the wonderland. The ever flowing air was fully fraught with the melodious songs of the retinues of the god. Looking on the side of the roads were the flowers shaped into various forms. To my astonishment there was outburst of voice which inflicted intolerable pain in the ear as it began,”Yogso becho goyung jaineng through olo” which means ‘ will give a blow on your head’.
It was my friend Jash the friend I want to meet in the place I was going.

“I am very happy” he began as his eyes wondered to fixed the gaze on mine,”that the god has made the astounding plan to meet us together once again though I detached my body and soul from the college where we studied together for a year”. “Yeah,it gives me profound delight to see you after three years of your departure from Bangalore”, I responded,”and to tell you the truth, I am not here just because the Kerala-your native place is beautiful, its because my heart pushed me to this place to see you,dear friend". “Yeah! I know that”, he continued,”well lets go to my hometown its far from this bus station”. We got inside the super fast bus and journeyed till we reached the place by name Varkala.
“I guess this is the place where you belong right?” I questioned him. “Well we will go by the bike,its twenty minutes away from this place” he answered. Fifteen minutes of journey by the bike let the concrete wall engraved with the word Jashland to rolled down in front of my eyes. He put the brake as his mouth opened to say,”please be here in the lobby, I will be right back”. Within a minute he opened the door where I saw many smiling faces to welcome me to the house. Hell of conversations went on with his mother . Though it gave no meaning, I very well knew that he was introducing me to his mom.
After few minutes, I and my friend Lhab was told to come for the breakfast. Looking on the table I could see varities of dishes waiting for us.They have arranged all sorts of edible stuffs as if it was meant for offering to the god almigty. I took almost all the share that was meant for me. Heavy breakfast punched us down to sleep.

When the sun in the azure sky was shining merrily, we went to the beach. The whole body started shuddering when the eyes caught the sight of the huge roaring ocean. I could beheld as if the gigantic man was approaching me as the huge roll of waves made its way to the bay.But they became my friends as we came to the beach time and again.Lugubriously the time was too brutal for me.Three days flew away like the minute and made my head tilt towards Bangalore with the socket of my eyes filled with the tears. The tears got dryed up as cool air of the speeding train entered through the window.

I woke up with the start as the honking sounds of the train wrung my ear to signify that its in Bangalore.So it was really a beautiful trip I ever made in my life.

Wednesday, September 8, 2010

The last cry

The sun in the heaven was smiling with gay as we started our journey to Bhutan. It was on 27th of November 2009.Everything in our ways seemed to be in celebrative state: the bird singing a melodious song, vehicle honking and conking, children dancing in the street, and so forth. And in the midst of jubilation my heart got light with the delight as I received a call from the gal friend, now a wife to someone.

So thrilling was the journey in the train. There were eight of us in the same berth. Singing, dancing, chatting, eating and teasing was the usual chore in the journey.As the face of NJP approached in front of us, we got down from the train. There was man waiting for our arrival with a car and he was the uncle of my senior friend Aue Phuntsho. He was very kind enough to take us to the guest house where we filled our belly with the scrumptious dishes.We had a beautiful sleep as the food churning in the stomach posed fatigue in the whole body.

We woke up from the death slumber with the hope to catch the bus but to no avail.So we hired the taxi which took few hours to reach our country. There we entered in the hotel to strengthen our body with the breakfast. I could see that my friends had almost finished their share when I was lost in thought to meet her.I walked out from the restaurant to make a call. “Hello,” came the sweet voice. “Hello Karma,”I replied, “how are you? This is Nima here.” There was a brief moment of silence until she began,”so when are you coming to capital?” “Well I will be right there in the evening” I answered,”so hope to see you there, bye”. Within an hour later, I started my journey from Phuntsholing to Thimphu, it was the longest journey I ever travelled.
When I reached the booking, my happiness found no bound to see her in a thick woollen overcoat waiting for my arrival. I got down from the bus only to see her eyes filled with tears of joy or tear of sadness? “Hi glad to see you “ tremulous voice came from the glowing lips,”this is sim I bought for you, so do keep in touch with me through it phaya?” “All right”I said as I fixed my gaze on the ground. As the horizon of Thimphu was fully covered with the fleecy blanket of night, our conversation came to end with” okay see you Karma, I am going”. Though she was left behind, I could feel her presence inside the mind.I was very happy that she called me to ensured my safe arrival in my brother’s house.

The luck did favour us. I was on holiday and she too had done with the common civil service exam, so she enquired me to head towards respective native home. Everything was done by her from booking ticket to preparing lunch. As planned we started our journey to home town but departed from Gelegphu as she has brother-in-law going to her home. I too began shortening the way to my home as the Buli bus pulled me with its full vigor to Gomphu. I reached my home by the providence of the almighty.

Though we were far from each other, cell phone kept us closer. So everything was preplanned: she was busy planning to go for hunting available job and on other hand I too was hectic planning to go for college.

We met there in one of our friends house in Thimphu. There we had beautiful enjoyable times, I guess it won’t get evaporated from my mind until the age or illness nock me down and devoid me of life. It was there in the same house, she cried with the head resting on my lap like the child demanding something from the mother. I tried every means to comfort her and to stopped her from shedding tears but to no avail. I was drowned,fully drowned in the depth of sadness as I was not in position to hold back her tears. She gave me no reasons for the same which made my heart heavy with profound sadness. Everything restored back to normal as our friends, the owner of the house returned.

As the time got shorten to return to the college, I promised her that I will be back in August after my exam. I found as if I was in the prison as I began my college hours in the ever increasing heat of the classroom. Despite busy and hectic schedule I called her once in fortnight, but a time came where she was reluctant to answer my call and that was the end of our relationship and it was a beginning of new relationship for her.

So the cry she cried was the last cry and will never cry in the journey of my life!

She was a liar!

The night of the Bangalore was filled with the roaring and thundering horn of thunder, it was on 30th of March. The heaven was enveloped under the blanket of darkness barring all the celestial bodies from celebrating their life. My heart was thumping vigorously at its alarming pace with the force of depression and anxiety.

To colour my life with the colour of peace and tranquillity, I ran outside to fill the tummy of the cell with the voucher and to call the heart I love with all my heart. I pressed selectively the numbers which combined intricately to form her contact number. I dialed them fifty or so times but she was deaf to my call. I messaged her at least to response to it but to no avail.

I woke up with the start as the glow of sun smiled through the polarised window glass with the disappearance of horrifying night-it was really a gruesome night for the continuous gush of thoughts kept on buzzing and swarming through the brain. Unsatisfied I called her but she was talking with someone. I tried time and again until her cell was open to the waves of my call. I kept on ringing the bell of her cell but she was silent. She received the call after throwing the emotionally moving message to the screen of her cell. Her voice was shallow, soft and hollow as if she has been sick for the last the three months as she said,"Nima I am sick". "Well karma" I began my conversation with her, "I will be right there to help you get out of the sickness or at least to admit you in the hospital". "No", shrill broken voice responded again, "please don't take so much trouble to come". I put an end to our conversation as I hung up my cell with, "I am coming today, right now".

I begged and borrowed money from my friends who were shocked with my sudden flash of ideas to head for my motherland. Yet they were eager to help me out in finding the solution for the problems I was in. Five thousands or so bucks of cash was more than enough to carry me for Bhutan.

I along with the friend Ugyen started our journey in the train; sacrificing everything: comfort, peace, study, and works. In the train, my body was but the food, cooking in the hot flow of streaming wind. I could do nothing to stop my body from searing and boiling in the boiling gases.

To my astonishment, I found my body at Phuntsholing,one of the most popular towns in Bhutan. I stepped in into the shop to buy sim card and called her again. Dolorously way to her cell was blocked and barred. All my nerves and sinews were numbed and motionless because of profound emotional disturbances. I then drew the line of communication with her sister after my sleeping vital organs came to live again."Hey Aje, this is Nima" I started ,"how is Karma? I came all the way from Bangalore just to see her because she told me that she was seriously ill"."She is a shit", she replied me, her voice was harsh and furious with the marked of anguish and sadness in the tone," she was married to a physiotherapy guy. She was madly in love with him. Nima, I am sorry". "Its fine Aje, no one can break the bond of love tied by the ribbon of faith, trust, care and concern", with that I lied down on the bed and to forget the shit until the crowds of past memories collided in the bubble of the mind and kept me awake.

I did all the measures as all people do to calm down the hot and humid sensation circulating inside the mind, but nothing proved to be satisfactory therapy. And suddenly I realized but didn't realize that I was there to help her but to get myself trapped in the trap of her lie, deception,cheat, fraud, and false promise. She was a liar